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Welcome to golf on earth. Because so many couples are entering into the game, this is the ideal time to take a closer look at the differences between men and women and see how we can make this game a more positive experience for both sexes.The first questions to ask is why do men choose to play golf in the first place, and why do women choose to play golf? From the research and feedback I have gathered, men choose to play golf because it is a challenge. Golf is a game men love to conquer. It is the endless quest for perfection, and they spend lots of blood, sweat and tears trying to beat the invisible foe. Golf is not personal to men, it is a business. Women, on the other hand, play golf for relationships; it is very personal. Women play golf to spend time with their husbands, friends, kids and clients. The experience of being with people they care about is important to them. Although women can enjoy competition, the main priority for playing golf is to have fun. If they do not achieve this goal they will probably not stick with it. The very act of choosing an instructor says a lot about the differences between men and women. Men care about how much their instructor “knows.” The pro of their choice better be up to date with the latest and greatest in golf technology and information. Women want to know how much their instructor “cares. ” Females need to actually like the person who is teaching them. It is a bonding experience for women to take golf lessons, much like spending time with their hairdresser, massage therapist or real estate agent. A golf instructor to a woman represents a friend and confidant. Remember that a woman's motivation for playing golf is to have a positive experience. It should not be made into something more serious, or complicated. When golf starts to resemble rocket science, the typical woman will get into her space ship and leave. All this means we need to be aware of our differences when men and women play golf together. Women are playing for a positive experience, not to perfect themselves. If a woman is paired with a male and he is analyzing her every swing, it feels as though she is wearing a billboard across her chest that reads, “FIX ME. ” Many men go right into their “fix it” mode when they are playing with the woman they love, even though they would hate it for that very woman to do the same thing to them. Should a woman correct a male on every other swing, it would not be a pretty sight. John Gray, in his book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, recommends that a woman not give unsolicited advice to men about anything. A male will interpret this as critical and unloving, even offensive. The best solution for couples playing golf together is to split the partners up, letting the guys ride with each other and gals ride together. This not only speeds up the play as both sexes can play from their own tees, but allows the guys to speak “Martian” with each other, while the gals try to come up with the “Venetian” solution for golf and life. The men enjoy exchanging information about the latest and greatest in golf equipment, golf balls, how the golf course is set up, and who said what about the golf swing on The Golf Channel. Women are multi-taskers, and they prove it because they can talk and swing at the same time! No problem, women can easily carry on conversations about their kids, the latest guest on the Oprah show, favorite diet secrets…and all while they are swinging away! Separating the couples into different carts is a definite key to a fun day for both couples. If that is not possible, then the next best thing is for the couples to be made aware of the differences and make an agreement that the guys will not “fix” the gals during the round, and the women will agree not to “talk” while the guys are swinging. Bottom line, there is no good reason we can not enjoy this game together. Men may be from Mars and women may be from Venus, but we are both playing golf on the planet Earth, so we had better got along, or one of us could be leaving! Venus Golf was founded by CEO Debbie Steinbach (aka Venus), author of the popular book, Venus on the Fairway, former LPGA touring pro and a Golf for Women Magazine "Top 50" instructor. Steinbach competed for 12 years on the Tour and now devotes her time to instruction and motivational speaking plus other activities associated with her company. Venus Golf is dedicated to women’s golf. From instruction to motivational speaking…from health and fitness to wedge selection, Venus Golf turns information into recreation, making golf fun for women. Venus Golf has headquarters in LaQuinta, Calif. The Venus Golf Website is located at www.venusgolf.com.
What is your view on this issue? Send your comments to venus@venusgolf.com.
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